Stop Settling For Less! A Needs Masterclass
Stop Settling For Less! A Needs Masterclass
£49.00
- Are you trying to find a partner or establish boundaries in an existing relationship but struggle with the ‘how’?
- Does just thinking about ‘needs’ or the idea of communicating them to someone trigger anxiety or fear of appearing ‘needy’?
- Have you been involved with emotionally unavailable people or in shady relationships, or settled for whatever you can get?
You’re not ‘needy’ for having needs; you’re human!
In my two-hour online workshop, I will teach you the real deal about settling, how to recognise and meet your needs, and how to go from worrying that the sky’s going to fall down if you have needs and putting everyone else first, to gradually building your confidence to take care of you. When you stop settling for less, you make way for the people, things and situations that reflect the life you need, desire and deserve.
Sunday 21st February, 3.30 pm GMT on Zoom. Replay available.
The early-bird price is available until 17th February but book early to avoid missing out as spots are limited.
The Anxiety Sessions
The Anxiety Sessions
£19.00
Do you sometimes feel as if your body is failing you by being anxious when you just want to be okay or ‘normal’?
Do you engage in habits of people-pleasing, perfectionism, overgiving, over-responsibility or overthinking?
Are you confused or in the dark about why you are anxious in certain situations?
Have you talked yourself out of doing something you wanted to because of anxiety?
Do you feel as if you ruined a relationship or opportunity because of your anxious behaviour?
Anxiety is a normal, valid and necessary emotion, but for many, it spells problems and doom. Understanding why anxiety is showing up and the origins of your habit of responding can help you to reclaim yourself from what might feel at times like a paralysing emotion. Over seven sessions, I share healing insights into anxiety and offer tips and tools for breaking the cycle of how you respond to it.
What you get with your purchase:
- 7 X audio sessions (mp3) 1 hour 33 minutes
- Support guide with tips and journaling prompts.
Topics covered include:
- Why we learned to respond to anxiety in the way that we do, including factors that contribute to a habit of under- or over-responding to it
- The specific reasons why we’re anxious and responding with paralysis or the likes of people-pleasing and perfectionism
- What your anxiety is trying to communicate to you, including what it’s telling you about your inner state, what you’re doing or what’s going on around you
- The two specific things that anxiety calls on you to do and ways that you can respond proactively and lovingly
- Tactics for taking care of you and living your life in such a way that it heals old anxiety patterns and reduces anxiety in your life
This class, like any I teach, isn’t medical advice, nor is it a substitute for it. If you have an anxiety disorder (or believe you might), these sessions don’t cover this subject. It doesn’t mean that you won’t find the information useful, particularly around the possible origins of your anxiety or what anxiety is asking you to do, but it does mean you should seek professional support.
The Intuition Sessions
The Intuition Sessions
£19.00
If you want to feel as if you can trust yourself and be more confident in making decisions and recognising opportunities and issues, you need to be willing and able to listen to your intuition. But what is it, how do you distinguish it from fear (or ego), and how do you start to listen to your intuition when you’ve typically ignored it. This is why I’ve created The Intuition Sessions, a series of ten audio classes and accompanying support guide that teaches you how to recognise, connect with and harness your inner wisdom.
What you get with your purchase:
- 10 X audio sessions (mp3) – total time 80 minutes
- Support guide with tips and tools
Topics covered include:
- Recognising how intuition and fear manifest differently in the body and how to distinguish their messages
- What the inner critic is really all about
- Signs of ego-driven thinking and behaviour that let you know that you’re not being who you really are
- Why you sometimes experience anxiety and intuition at the same time, and what you can learn from it
- Is your intuition wrong sometimes and learning from those instances when you didn’t listen
Work Through Your No Contact Doubts Workbook
Work Through Your No Contact Doubts Workbook
£4.99
It’s not uncommon to find it difficult to move forward after a breakup due to boundary issues or feeling overconnected through the likes of texting and social media. When this happens, it’s likely that you will consider or make the decision to go No Contact. Even though this is a healthy and often necessary decision, doubt can cause you not to make it or to keep breaking it once you’ve started.
My Work Through Your No Contact Doubts workbook helps you to uncover and work through your No Contact doubts so that you don’t undermine your feelings, needs and desires, but also so that you understand what’s truly driving you in those times of doubt.
Format: PDF (it’s editable so that you can type into it, or you can print it out).
No of pages: 9
After purchase, you will receive your download link via email.
The Perfectionism Sessions
The Perfectionism Sessions
£19.00
Do you know what procrastination, disassociating from your achievements and accomplishments, feeling not ‘good enough’, and judging you based on age, appearance, background, past mistakes, etc., have in common? They are all forms of perfectionism.
I believe that consistently feeling fulfilled and happy while also enjoying more loving relationships means unlearning everything that we’ve been taught throughout our life about what it really means to be worthy, lovable and successful. This is why I’ve created The Perfectionism Sessions. Get clear on what it is, how it manifests in your life and what drives it. Learn small yet transformative habits to gradually and lovingly break the cycle.
What you get with your purchase:
- 10 X audio sessions (mp3)
- Examples of perfectionism (5-page expanded list – PDF)
- What’s Driving You? Needs exercise (PDF) + the follow-up guide to the exercise (PDF)
Topics covered include:
- How perfectionism manifests in different forms through self-criticism, your attitude to accomplishments, achievements and approaching projects, tasks and trying things, interpersonal relationships, and communication.
- Why perfectionism is a form of control used to compensate for old hurts and losses while protecting you at the same time.
- The importance of recognising the connection between perfectionism and anxiety, including the messages that your actions, as well as your body, are trying to communicate to you so that you can radically transform your perception of perfectionism and start listening to you.
- How both ‘good’ and ‘bad’ childhoods contribute to perfectionism.
- How to differentiate between your inner critic and your inner voice and understanding your inner critic’s agenda so that you stop treating it like the boss of you or even as if it’s who you are.
- Why cutting back on perfectionism won’t make you ‘complacent’ and will actually lead to you being happier in what you do and who you are.
- How to use recovering from setbacks and self-criticism to understand what you needed — and how to meet that need.
Facing Regret Journaling Guide
Facing Regret Journaling Guide
£7.49
“If I could turn back time, if I could find a way!”
Cher sang these words back in the eighties to lament her inability to go back in time and take back everything she regretted doing to the object of her affections. Hindsight, of course, gives us 20:20 vision hence why we experience regret. As humans, we will all experience and move on from this, but why do some of our regrets cause us to feel paralysed about how to move forward or have us going round in circles in a relationship or situation long past its sell-by-date>
Well, it’s because the way that we’re looking at things is the problem. We’ve got used to telling the story in the same way and beating ourselves up. It’s very possible that we think we’ve blown something or that we’ve ‘lost’. It’s wounding when we feel and think like this, and it sends us into a vicious cycle that knocks our sense of self. So what can we do instead?
In my Facing Regret Journaling Guide, I help you to compassionately interrogate your regret with a series of journaling prompts so that you can adjust your perspective enough to begin healing and feeling better. Acceptance, not of incorrect stories, but of what really happened and who you really are gets your engine going again. You stop feeling stuck and start moving forward.
In the guide, you’ll discover
- Why the very thing that you think shouldn’t have happened might be precisely the right thing that needed to happen
- What persistently regretting something can be a cover for
- Questions to help you look at the same story you’ve maybe told yourself a thousand times in an entirely different way
You will receive:
- Facing Regret Journaling Guide (PDF)
- Facing Regret Journaling Guide (MP3 audio version – 41 minutes)
- Journaling | Tips To Get You Started (PDF)
Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl eBook
Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl eBook
£12.00
Are you the Fallback Girl?
If you’ve ever found yourself in a relationship that feels and seemingly looks like one, but you’re struggling with commitment, or you’ve been in the ambiguous territory of a ‘casual relationship’, you’ve expended much time, energy, effort and emotion deciphering what the hell is going on.
You’ve likely tried to change them. Maybe you’ve wondered what you ‘did’ to cause this or what you can do to win their love and commitment, or even whether you’re going crazy.
Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl is the definitive guide to understanding the relationship between emotionally unavailable men and the women that love them. From explaining how and why they blow hot and cold, to where that future they promised went to, how you’ve ended up being a booty call, why you’ve been together for a gazillion years but aren’t going anywhere, and more importantly how and why you’re involved with them in the first place, all of the answers are here. You know you’re dealing with unavailability when you ask stuff like:
- What happened to that ‘great guy’ from the beginning?
- Why won’t he break up or stay away if he doesn’t want to commit?
- What the hell did I do to make him disappear?
- Is he going to leave ‘her’ for me?
- It’s because he’s shy/busy/scared of his feelings, isn’t it?
Inspired by the real-life adventures in unavailability of myself and the readers of my site BaggageReclaim.com, Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl is an empowering, entertaining and inspiring read that will wise you up to pitfalls such as men who aren’t over their exes, Future Fakers, guys that have more baggage than a Heathrow terminal and reappearing childhood ‘sweethearts’.
If you want to understand your own availability, and why commitment in a healthy relationship is eluding you, Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl is your guide to being available and attracted to healthy, available partners.
About this Version
This package includes the ePub version which works on iPhones, iPads (use in apps like iBooks and Goodreader) as well as suitable for the Nook. This package includes an exclusive Feelings Diary worksheet, a beliefs guide worth £5, a Do I Need To Cut Contact Worksheet, plus the Unsent Letter Guide and worksheets. You can also buy a Kindle version of this book on Amazon. Please note the Kindle version does not come with the extras this PDF pack contains.
Downloading
After you’ve completed the checkout process, you will receive an email within a few minutes of ordering with the links for downloading your ebook files.
Please refer to eBook FAQS if you have any queries.
Want to purchase a physical copy?
UK and Europe – Readers can purchase Mr Unavailable & the Fallback Girl from Amazon.co.uk. Signed copies are available through this shop – purchase a signed copy.
US & Canada – Available in Paperback via Amazon.com and also via Createspace, which is also part of Amazon. Createspace also make the book available through various online sellers which you can check via the Amazon.com link.
All other countries – Where applicable on Amazon.com and also via its subsidiaries and sellers.
Kindle – Amazon.co.uk Amazon.com Amazon.de Amazon.fr
Curbing Your Obsession Quick Guide (ebook)
Curbing Your Obsession Quick Guide (ebook)
£4.99
Sometimes we find it hard to recover from a loss or feel as if we’ve been abandoned again which can resurrect old wounds. We can become fixated on where we think that we went wrong or the injustice of the outcome or plotting strategies to tip the situation in our favour. Next thing our days, weeks, months and even years are lost in repeatedly going over the chain of events, checking up on their activities online, torturing ourselves over what is put on Facebook et al, or doing stuff to gain attention and prevent what we perceive as an unfavourable outcome. Somewhere along the way, we lose sight of ourselves and our emotional, mental, physical and spiritual health can be severely impacted if we don’t step in and help ourselves and seek additional support.
If you’re stuck in a cycle of unhealthy thinking and behaviour due to a toxic cocktail of blame, shame, ruminating, jealousy, possessiveness and almost constant fear, you’re experiencing obsession and you’re far from being alone. Recognising what you’re experiencing and where these thoughts and feelings come from are the first steps to breaking the cycle and getting to a healthier, happier you.
In this detailed Quick Guide, I explain obsession, where these feelings and thoughts are coming from and what you’re trying to achieve when you keep repeating the cycle of behaviour and thinking, along with tips and tools to help you move forward.
Please refer to eBook FAQS if you have any queries.
The Dreamer and the Fantasy Relationship eBook
The Dreamer and the Fantasy Relationship eBook
£11.00
Most people if asked, would deny that they’d ever had a fantasy relationship as they’re associated with pretending to be with someone or in something that’s non-existent, however, it’s time for you to change what you think you know.
In this modern age of texts, email, Facebook, online dating, and casual relationships, it’s never been so easy to find yourself in a crumb filled fantasy relationship. An increasing number of people are satisfied with sprinklings of attention and interaction which they use to give themselves the illusion of being loved, cared for and in control because they get to avoid commitment, intimacy, and ‘full-on’ rejection.
The Dreamer and the Fantasy Relationship is for every woman who’s been caught short by their overactive imagination and their great expectations.
Struggled to get over a relationship that didn’t truly exist? Don’t understand how you wound up spending years with someone you hardly see? Keep letting your assumptions and projections run away with you?
It’s time to come back down to earth and face reality so you can take action in your present, face your real future, and get happy.
Acting as a companion guide to Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl, the no holds barred ‘bible’ for understanding excuse filled, commitment dodging, unavailable men and the women that they fall back on for an ego stroke, shag, and a shoulder to lean on, I wanted to introduce a new role due to the sheer number of emails and comments I receive from women who actually believe that the crumbs that they’re receiving, particularly via cheap talk, grand promises, texts, email and Facebook are a relationship or ‘love’.
You need to read this if:
You’re an Escapist, dissatisfied with your current relationship, mentally checking out, complaining about your expectations not being met, and even starting an affair with someone else.
You’re a Crusher, ‘loving’ and admiring someone from a distance that puts you in that unreciprocated feelings setting.
You’re a Virtual, spending too much time surfing dating sites, relying on the written word and getting high off the buzz of a text or email coming through.
You’re a Tabber, angry, hurt and feeling rejected because your relationship is over so regaining a sense of control by devoting your time and energy to tracking your ex via social networking and poking around in his life.
The Dreamer and the Fantasy Relationship explains how fantasy relationships work, why they’re so attractive, the types of fantasy relationship and Mr Unavailable that you’re likely to be involved with, and provides practical tips and tools for breaking the habit and tackling issues such as rejection avoidance, and fear of abandonment, criticism and conflict. Delivered with my no-fluff dose of reality and plenty of humour, I want to empower you to let go of the illusions so that you can be available for an available relationship in the real world.
About this Version
This is a PDF and the pack of files, which includes a Feelings Diary worksheet, The Mini Guide To No Contact, Beliefs Guide, Get Out of Stuck (free version) and the Unsent Letters.
Downloading
After you have been through checkout and paid, you will be given the option to download the file. The email contains links to each of the files in your purchase.
If you have any problems please get in contact us where we can deal with your query promptly – you may find that your query can be resolved by checking out the FAQ.
How To Self-Soothe Quick Guide
How To Self-Soothe Quick Guide
£4.99
When we’re reliant on external esteem to feel happy and secure, we end up feeling anything but these; instead, we end up reliant on stuff, substances, unhealthy actions, and the validation of others. We look outside of us to feel better and end up feeling as if we have no control over our lives. Each time we experience an emotion that we have a negative association with, we try to push it down or away. In turn, when we want to feel good, we end up looking for artificial boosts that provide us with temporary relief and happy feelings but are underpinned by blame and shame.
It doesn’t have to be like this.
Clients, readers and listeners ask me about initial steps that they can take that will enable them to learn how to take care of their feelings and to calm down responses in situations where they tend to engage in unhealthy self-soothing. They do some of their worst self-destruction in response to feelings of loneliness, boredom or stress, often breaking No Contact because of the onset of discomfort and having no inner support and tools to respond in a constructive and loving manner.
This Quick Guide was created for students of my online courses, with many citing it as being invaluable as it’s designed to help you to get into the process quickly. It includes suggestions as well as prompts to help you brainstorm ways in which you can comfort you as well as promoting an honest conversation about the things that are dragging you down.
It includes the Feelings Diary Journaling Guide, which has prompts to help you support your self-soothing by jotting down your feelings as well as a Day Tracker worksheet, perfect for getting conscious, aware, and present about your day. While this worksheet is aimed at people who struggle with reaching out to someone toxic, the worksheet can simply be used to track your days so that you can gather data on what is and isn’t working for you.
What happens after purchase?
You will receive a receipt confirming your purchase and an email with the download links for the ebook and accompanying resources. Files are issued as PDFs (readable on everything, plus printable) and, where applicable, ePubs, a mobile device version that needs to be opened through the appropriate app (your mobile device will point you to this). Check out the FAQ for ebooks.
Get Out of Stuck ebook and worksheet pack
Get Out of Stuck ebook and worksheet pack
£7.49
Challenge & transform unhealthy beliefs so that you can reclaim you.
Over one hundred thousand people have taken my 21-day Get Out of Stuck email course (or used the previous mini version) and I’m frequently asked for a printable version as well as something that can be read on various devices in one go.
Get Out of Stuck is the Baggage Reclaim process for homing in on unhealthy beliefs and associations that are keeping you stuck in a pattern that isn’t working for you. If you’ve taken many rides on the disappointment cycle and are wondering how your thinking is affecting your attitude and choices, this is the guide for you. This guide takes a compassionate look under the hood of beliefs and helps you to uncover the motivations and past experiences that are driving you today.
The ebook features 21 lessons packed with actionable tools and mindset-shifts that have helped me to transform my own life and live and love with my self-esteem in tow. If you’re tired of winding up in variations of the same situation with similar people in different packages; if you’re tired of feeling afraid or feeling gripped by something from your past, Get Out of Stuck is a healing process that will arm you with compassionate tools to give you your freedom. I developed this process and guide in response to the many requests for insight into how I’ve healed and grown my own self-awareness and self-knowledge.
The first half of the lessons give you grounding insights into how beliefs work and why you have the ones that you do and the remaining lessons take you through the process. There are worksheets to help you shine a light of awareness on your underlying beliefs and this pack includes a ‘releasing exercise’ that isn’t included in the [now closed] email version of the course, along with my Feelings Diary Journaling Guide and the Unsent Letter Guide. Your purchase includes two versions of the ebook – the PDF which is for printing, reading on computers, and basically opens on any device and the ePub which is specially formatted for mobile devices like phones, tablets and eReaders (excluding Kindle).
The No Contact Rule ebook
The No Contact Rule ebook
£12.00
You’re trying to get over your ex, yet you’re still in touch and have ended up being their back-up plan. Maybe you haven’t left yet, but you want to and just don’t know how. Maybe you’re tired of doing the lather, rinse, repeat of getting back together and winding back at square one.
It’s time to cut contact.
The No Contact Rule is an inspiring guide to extinguishing the temptation to stay in touch or to keep engaging, helping you to reclaim your sense of self and move on to a healthier relationship.
I’ve helped thousands of people break free from unhealthy relationships and breakups after using No Contact to kick a toxic relationship and transform my life. Discover what ‘NC’ is and how to do it, how to break an unhealthy cycle and navigate various situations – from Facebook to pesky texts, working together, sharing a child or feeling trapped by your feelings and thoughts. Cut contact and put the focus on you. By treating you with the love, care, trust and respect you deserve, this could be one of the best decisions you’ve ever made.
About this Version
This is the 2nd edition of this book and is more than double the original size. For a detailed description, see The No Contact Rule book page over at Baggage Reclaim. Please note that not all items that are available with this purchase are available with other formats.
Downloading
After you have been through checkout and paid, you will be given the option to download the file. There are three tries for downloading.
Your email contains a list of the files available for downloading.
PDF is a standard file format which is great for reading on your computer, printing and can also be read on various mobile apps like Goodreader.
Epub is specifically formatted for mobile devices and eReaders (Apple iPad/iBooks, Nook, Sony Reader, Kobo, and most e-reading apps including Stanza, Aldiko, Adobe Digital Editions, and Readability. It doesn’t work on Kindle). Your pack also includes a Feelings Diary worksheet and The Unsent Letter Guide 2nd edition ebook and worksheet.
If you have any problems downloading, please get in contact us where we can deal with your query promptly – you may find that your query can be resolved by checking out the FAQ.
100 Days of Baggage Reclaim
100 Days of Baggage Reclaim
£7.49
Are you ready to change how you feel about yourself and transform your life?
One hundred days from now you’ll get to meet the new, improved, happier you!
The key to feeling good and having a great relationship is treating and regarding yourself with love, care, trust and respect before you develop those feelings for another person. Easy, right? If you’re already shaking your head, then I understand, and it’s precisely why I created this 100-day project.
We rarely take the time to appreciate and love anything about ourselves. So how can we expect others to develop those feelings?
I’ve been where you are and know first hand the change you will feel when you learn to let go of excess emotional baggage. Not only can it instantly make a difference to your emotional, mental, physical and spiritual well-being but it also makes space for more loving experiences and relationships. And when you are confident and comfortable in your own skin, you’ll soon draw in the right people, things and situations for you.
Wouldn’t it feel great to just know what to do and how to get what you wanted? You can begin today and start to make sense of your past experiences and habits.
Investing a little time and energy into you each day makes a significant difference if you’re self-critical, prone to people pleasing, or you struggle to create, forge and sustain healthy relationships.
100 Days of Baggage Reclaim is packed with plenty of bite-sized doses of inspiration, mindset shifts, tips and practices to help you make radical shifts in a relatively short period. Some of the days are about stretching your thought process, while others involve trying something new or achieving a small task. This will all help to build your self-esteem, change unhealthy habits of thinking and behaviour and encourage a far more positive frame of mind.
Also included are journaling prompts to help you increase self-awareness and inner-knowledge so that by the end, you know ‘you’ far better than you did before. You might even surprise yourself!
Afterwards, you’ll find you are less inclined to get sucked into unhealthy patterns. The pace is entirely up to you so you can, of course, read ahead or just take it a day at a time — whichever feels right for you. Many of the Baggage Reclaim tribe have mentioned that there is so much valuable knowledge they dip back into it every now and then to help them stay on track in the long-term.
Get to know and love the real you, boost your confidence, and bake self-care into the day-to-day of your life.
About this Version
This ebook like everything from Baggage Reclaim is in British English. The download package includes the ePub version which works on iPhones, iPads (use in apps like iBooks and Goodreader) as well as being suitable for the Nook. You will receive a zip file which you need to download and open to access the files.
There is also a PDF version which can be used on any device including phones and computers.
Downloading
After you’ve completed the checkout process, you will receive an email within a few minutes of ordering with the links for downloading your ebook files. You have 30 days and 3 attempts to download the files.
Please refer to eBook FAQS if you have any queries.
Embrace Healthy Boundaries
Embrace Healthy Boundaries
£97.00
If you want to feel less stressed, anxious and resentful about the increasing demands on your time and energy knowing how and why you need to create healthy boundaries even with loved ones is crucial to your well-being and close relationships. But, how do you create a boundary without alienating or being abandoned by people, and how do you know what’s fair and reasonable?
This is why I created Embrace Healthy Boundaries, a short course that teaches you how to create and assert your boundaries from a place of love, care, trust and respect in as little as thirty days. It’s got everything you wished you’d been taught earlier in life! No, you won’t be able to control other people’s feelings and behaviour, but I will take you from being terrified or wishy-washy about boundaries to gradually becoming confident about respecting your time, energy, effort and emotions as well as those of others.
Packed with scripts, tips, strategies and journaling prompts, learn my simple yet powerful concept for putting healthy boundaries into practice straight away, plus learn how to be boundaried even in situations where the other party doesn’t want to be. And all without saying “My boundaries are….”!
CHANGE YOUR LIFE IN AS LITTLE AS A MONTH BY LEARNING HOW TO ENJOY MORE RESPECT IN YOUR RELATIONSHIPS
- Are you sick and tired of feeling like a doormat but don’t know where to begin with improving your situation?
- Do you pride yourself on being kind, giving, loyal, good etc., and yet you’re secretly grappling with reoccurring feelings of blame, shame, resentment, anxiety, frustration, helplessness and more?
- Do you have boundaries in some areas but really struggle in intimate relationships due to fear of conflict, criticism, rejection, disappointment and abandonment?
- Feel as if you’re good at the self-care until you start dating, and then your boundaries and everything you learned from previous experiences goes out the window?
If you answered ‘yes’ to just one of these questions, it’s time for you to embrace healthy boundaries so that you can live and love with confidence.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN
- A powerful concept for understanding and living your boundaries that will transform not just the way you interact with others but will also clear out resentment, frustration, anger, etc., so that you can take down walls and finally move on from painful experiences that have impacted your attitude to boundaries up to this point.
- How you can be boundaried even with somebody who seems allergic to boundaries, as well as how to redefine relationships that have typically stressed your self-esteem.
- The signs of unfair and unreasonable behaviour and situations, plus how to get clear about what does and doesn’t work for you, and the ‘tells’ that let boundary busters know that you’re a viable option.
- How to recognise and act upon the helpful messages from your body.
- How to have your own back with a supportive mindset so that you can own your boundaries instead of selling you short.
- How to communicate your boundaries with love, care, trust and respect (and without ever having to utter the words “My boundaries…”), even when somebody is wearing down your last nerve or you’re quaking on the inside due to fear of Dynasty-levels of drama.
You can get an even more detailed description of Embrace Healthy Boundaries in the courses section of Baggage Reclaim.